I calmed her down and pointed out the facts. A) Ex-douche is homeless and lives at a YMCA some 800 miles away. B) He's 2 years behind on his child support payments. C) He basically committed the crime of breaking and entering when he entered her home without her express permission. D) Her son does NOT want to move anywhere. E) Her son is almost 17 and no judge anywhere is going to pull him out of his home & school and move him anywhere, (not to his ailing grandmothers home in Florida and especially not to his fathers girlfriends house in town... yes, that's what ex-douche told her), unless there is abuse going on. Which there is not. She's one of the best mothers I know.
But I have seen this happen on so many occasions: Ex-spouses/partners using their children as pawns. They get angry and all that love they have for their children goes straight into the shitter. They may think it doesn't, but their actions prove otherwise. My question is WHY?! How in Gods name does it help your children? So you're pissed at your ex, big deal... Talk it out like an adult and get over it. But if you're that mad, and just have to be that fucking immature about it, then punch your ex in the face, slash their tires, shit on their front porch, spray paint obscenities on their car/house... hell, do anything else. But don't involve your kid(s) in your petty, juvenile bullshit just because you're mad and you know that that's the one thing that will hurt your ex the most. Because I will tell you this: You're only hurting your ex for a short time, but you're hurting your kid(s) for the rest of their lives. And here's the kicker: Kids eventually grow up, and when they do they see the truth. They see that it was you who carelessly played with their lives, they see that it was you who was manipulative with their mother/father, they see that it was you who cared so little for them that you put your need for revenge over their need for love and stability. And in the end they will resent you. For. The. Rest. Of. Their. Lives.
Photograph by: Me
(Selfish parents, you're just throwing yourselves in the flames...)